Sometimes the correct decision is simply to make one.
The Client Who Just Can't Decide
Ever had a client who struggles to pick a goal or, having picked one, can’t stick to it? Indecision for some can be downright paralyzing. Clients might waffle between competing dreams, procrastinate on small tasks, or flip-flop under pressure from other people’s opinions. For us coaches, guiding someone stuck in “I don’t know” mode (without simply telling them what to do) can feel like walking a tightrope.
So how do we help a client transform “I just can’t decide” into decisive action on their own terms?
Join us with CLCI Live while Live Jen Long (PCC), Anthony Lopez (MCPC), Brooke Adair Walters (ACC), Jerome LeDuff (MCLC), and Lisa Finck (MCC) where we get to the root of this indecision and learn how to encourage our clients into being active drivers of their success, rather than paralyzed participants.
The Real Reasons People Dither
Indecision isn’t just a quirky habit; it often stems from deeper worries. Some clients are petrified of making the “wrong” choice—because maybe in their childhood, failure was never an option. Others find themselves drowning in details, convinced there’s a single correct path if only they can gather enough information. People pleasers freeze because they don’t want to let anyone down. And let’s not forget the folks who get overwhelmed by infinite possibilities, jumping from one dream (like traveling the world) to another (like launching a business) but never settling on either.
To put it simply, indecision is often only a symptom of a larger problem and no two clients who are indecisive will be alike. The only commonality is that they cannot make a choice on which direction to go and that lack of momentum causes them to stall and nosedive their goals.
The irony is that not deciding ends up being a choice—a choice to remain stuck.
Coaching Approaches for Indecisive Clients (Less “Tell Me,” More “Try It”)
It would be so, so easy to just tell the client what to do. But, unfortunately, you aren't their consultant, you aren't their drill instructor, and you certainly aren't their parents.
Our job is not to make the decisions on the clients behalf as it can lead to so many unfortunate scenarios (do you really want to be responsible for a divorce, loss of income, or failure?)
On the flipside, we also don't want to take credit for the clients success and progress because of our ideas. As coaches, our job is to support, challenge, and partner with the client so they can be the authors of both their goals & success. So here is a few ways we can facilitate that:
Break Down the Big Stuff
Rather than demanding a grand commitment, like switching careers entirely, encourage and explore micro-decisions, the day-to-day challenges and objectives that make a goal. For example, if they’re considering a radical job change but don't know where to begin, ask have & how they've explored the options. What small differences would they like to see? What are the benefits & drawbacks of each decision?
Nudge with a Deadline
Some clients spin their wheels because there’s no countdown forcing them to choose. Suggest a gentle but firm cutoff: “Can you pick between Option A or B by next Tuesday.” Surprisingly, a ticking clock can feel liberating rather than stressful—because the client finally has permission to decide.
If you want a more advanced technique, you can ask if you can flip a coin and have them make a decision now. They obviously must consent to this seemingly radical decision and be fully committed to follow through with the coinflip. Then once the coin flips you can gauge their reaction and emotions towards the result. The trick here is to illuminate the clients intuition. Then you can ask if the client is secure in the decision made for them or if they would like to switch. In this exercise they are the one in control the whole time.
Uncover the Fear
Ask: “What’s the best/worst that could happen if you decide ‘wrong’?”
Clients often realize the actual risk is far less dire than what they imagine. Even if a decision leads to a shaky outcome, they’ll learn and move on, which is better than being stuck in perpetual ‘maybe.’
Identify & Notice Any Action Chronic overthinkers expect perfect outcomes. Acknowledge the act of choosing itself. Even if it’s a “baby step,” highlight the bravery it took to pick something. While we aren't being cheerleaders or praising, pointing out what we observe as coaches helps to reinforcement that action leads to results.
Beyond the Session: Watch for Red Flags
A touch of indecision is completely normal; who hasn’t hesitated at some point? But if your client literally cannot function without endless re-checking or constant reassurance, keep in mind that anxiety or other mental health conditions might be in play. Coaches aren’t therapists, and it’s vital to recognize when professional mental health support is needed.
Our Take: Decision-Making as a Skill
We believe at CLCI that deciding is like any other muscle: the more you do it, the stronger you get. That’s why we often encourage “just pick one,” even if it’s not guaranteed to be perfect. Yes, your client might fail or discover they want something else. Great—now they know more about themselves, and they can pivot strategically rather than waste another six months in the same cycle of indecision.
Ultimately, the point is to move forward, not to prove you picked the absolute best route from the get-go. And if they shift or change their mind later, at least they’re shifting from a place of new knowledge rather than sheer guesswork.
Guiding indecisive clients isn’t about handing them an answer on a silver platter. It’s about easing them away from “What if I choose wrong?” and toward “Let’s see where this goes.” Once they feel safe enough to test-drive decisions, they often realize multiple paths could lead to fulfillment, and they don’t need 100% certainty to start.
When a once-hesitant client looks you in the eye and says, “I’ve made my choice, and I’m ready to stand by it,” it’s a game-changer. You’ve helped them shift from paralysis to empowerment. And that’s why coaching exists in the first place—to turn “I don’t know” into “I’ve got this.”
Thank you,
Jen Long (PCC), Anthony Lopez (MCPC), Brooke Adair Walters (ACC), Jerome LeDuff (MCLC), and Lisa Finck (MCC)
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